The act and art of gaslighting Abba
“Miracle, stop using me.” Those were the clear and loud words I heard Abba tell me that morning. I was gravely ill and that fateful day was the second or third day of the illness. It seemed like I was walking at the edge of the pit of death.
Everything in my system resisted the effect of drugs and I desperately needed the drugs to work and to have immediate healing. No one loves being ill, especially not when you are on the verge of academic failure; it was the week for tests.
That week, it was as if everything was working against me. PHCN didn't supply electricity, there wasn't water in my hostel, and I had to ensure I was reading amid the turbulence. It was already an overwhelming week, and I didn't need to crown it with illness.
This resulted in me talking to my Abba. I told Him, “You have to either heal me or make these drugs work for me. You know I have tests ahead of me, you need to do something.” I got a response immediately and you know what He said already, “Miracle, stop using me.”
It was like someone poured iced water on my body. I understood what He said and meant because I knew I was indeed using Him. I hadn't been talking to Him that week and my excuse was that I didn't have the time; my workload was too great. I was going through my day without having a conversation with the one who owns me, made me and knows me. Then suddenly, something happens and now I need and have time for Him. So, I catwalk back to His presence and seek for help. If someone I love did that to me as well, I would be hurt.
What happened taught me that I can hurt the Holy Spirit's feelings. He feels, He has emotions and because of that, my actions can hurt Him.
I apologized and told him, “I'm truly sorry for how I've been treating you and for neglecting you.”
The Holy Spirit used this incident to teach me how so many believers have a “receive and go” relationship with Him. The only time your knees are bent in prayers is when your village people are after your life. You put your Father in your pocket when He is supposed to be a billboard you showcase everywhere you go. You shy away from His presence when you are supposed to forever dwell in His presence.
I put it to you today to stop using God. Stop being a parasite. Stop taking and taking from Him without giving the totality of yourself to Him. What baffles me is the audacity with which we go to Him when we need Him after we've neglected and ignored Him for so long. It's time to stop being the 1 that Abba leaves the 99 to chase after. Aren't you tired of the cat and rat chase? I know your Father is a merciful and loving one but He is much more joyful when you stay with and in Him. When your life is dedicated to worshipping Him and making Him seen and known through you. Be a child that gives his parents rest.
There's even a recent trend that everyone thinks it's funny until it's no longer funny. I'm not against reminding God of His promises for you or evoking His covenant over you to call Him to action. What I'm against is you boldly making these requests without having a cordial relationship with Him. You can freely access His throne now, the veil has been torn, and you have free access to the Father through the Son. What then is your excuse for not using your access effectively? Why is it that it's only when you have requests that you remember the access you've been given?
Dear believer, stop gaslighting your Father. Start chasing the true gift which is Abba and His kingdom and every other thing will be added to you. STOP USING GOD!
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